Missing....?

Remember the feeling you had when you found out there was no Santa Claus? You felt like you had lost a family member. You had an instant emptiness in your soul. You tried in your best naive way to rationalize your beliefs until inside you could no longer fool yourself. Anger at being so easily decepted replaces your sadness. Then you grew up, weather you wanted too or not.
We all have different category's of friends, and friends who intermingle in those category's. Good time friends, true blue friends, fair weather friends. I also have what I call my public TV friends. Like channel 2, they are the ones who only contact you when they need funding. They save the good stuff for when they want a contribution. I recently chose to disconnected on of these friends.
At first I missed him, or more like the notion of his existence. Then I realized it was only background noise. Circumstances forced my to talk with him recently. After ending the conversation disappointed, it came to me. How can you miss what you never had.